Priorities…

I decided to take some time off of Facebook. 🙂 A retreat with God and a fresh perspective on my role as a wife and mother.  I realize that good things sometimes become bad habits. Having a ministry on FB at times consumes all my free time and that is something I should never allow. So I took it to the Lord and He was clear…”spend time with me instead of doing things for me…” I also talked to my hubby about it and he was so gracious to tell me the truth in love. 🙂 So I listened. I listened because I fear God. Let me explain…when things in my life are out of balance conviction comes knocking. I can only ignore it for so long before God goes to my precious husband for him to deal with me. He is not harsh or mean…he is tender, sweet and loving yet is unafraid to tell me when my priorities are out of place. He does it out of love and because he wants what’s best for my life. I fear my Lord…the correct term is revere. I want His best for me. I want to spend time with Him, not just doing things for Him. I want to know His heart and fully enjoy the blessings He has given me. So I am fasting from FB, not that it is bad in and out of itself but the time I was spending on FB I am not spending reading the word and countless books…and I have got to tell you dear friends I feel refreshed and at ease. My thinking was somewhat flawed. I thought that since I was sharing the gospel, discussing theology and ministering to others THAT is the most valuable thing I can do for God. Boy was I mistaken. I knew in my heart this was not so but somehow I got caught up in “doing something bigger with more importance” than ministering to my own little ones. I knew there was nothing bigger than ministering to my children but my heart was not there yet…it was coming along. I now believe in my heart that my main ministry is my children. There is no one more important then them. To share the gospel with the lost is what I do in my home. Daily living it out before them and shepherding their hearts to the Savior.

Today I read one of my favorite blogs (Unplugged Family) and decided to do the same thing for our celebration of “love day” (we don’t celebrate St.Valentines day). I had such a great time with the little ones. We wrote down some things we were thankful for and hung them on willow bark. 🙂

Lex asks if she can do “school” on the weekends!

My little princess

They ❤ arts & crafts time

My sweet boy just loved watching his sisters

Lex loved decorating it!

JJ loves glue sticks!

Adding Jesus loves me stickers…

We recycle bottles and reuse them as you can see

It’s coming along…

The best one!!!

My tiny love…

The finished product

As a stay at home mom, I know there are times when I wrestle with believing that what I am doing day in and day out is of the utmost importance. Our culture makes it very clear to us that stay at home moms are those who have no hope in getting a “real job”. We are looked down upon and to top it off we wrestle with our own fears of inadequacy and “doing enough” or something “big enough” to be someone important enough. 🙂 So we run to alternative ways in which we can feel like we are making an impact. We pour our lives in “doing” instead of BEING. God created us as human beings not human doings. And where you are is exactly where He wants you. Even if the world is unaware of what you do, of your sacrifice…who cares? I mean really? God sees it. He is watching your faithfulness to your husband and children. Your selflessness and devotion. He cares about all the dishes you have to do, he cares about the attitude you have when you do them. He knows our heart better than we do so when our priorities are out of whack, He gently corrects us and guides us ont he right path. What I do in my home matters just as much as someone who has a hugely successful ministry because it is where God placed me. He entrusted me with my own ministry. My beautiful family. The days you feel like you aren’t making a difference, stop and look at the little lives you get to mold every day and thank God for allowing you to do so. It is an outstanding privilege and responsibility to raise the next generation.

A quiver full…we claim to trust Him but do we really?

How many arrows does a full quiver have? If you ask this question to a professional archer, they will tell you, 8. Eight arrows make a quiver “FULL”.

Psalm 127:3 “Behold, children are a gift of the LORD, The fruit of the womb is a reward . 4Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, So are the children of one’s youth. 5How blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them; They will not be ashamed When they speak with their enemies in the gate.

God’s view of children all throughout scripture is very clear. Children are a blessing and a reward from him. We seem to believe children are a blessing as long as we have as many as we can afford, as many as are on our checklist or as many allow us to travel. That is usually 2, max 3. The westernized thinking that children are a problem, or a headache has infiltrated the church and God’s people do not see children as God sees them any longer. (Note:This is something the catholics got right and we still haven’t gotten it yet! They are AGAINST birth control! )

The first objection I hear when talking to a fellow brother/sister in Christ about having more children is that “they have to be a good steward of what God has given them.” Can I suggest to you that verse has NOTHING to do with controlling how many children you should have but instead training them up (being a good steward) of what God has given you. Now what WE planned for ourselves…not what we think we need. Instead allowing God to dictate the number of children we should have. To try to control our life in such way, having a plan all laid out that we didn’t even bother to consult the Lord about is not wise for any of us to do. His ways are higher than ours so our plans will not necessarily be what He plans for us. Total surrender allows God to control every area of our lives.

Children are such a beautiful blessing and a great responsibility. They challenge us to be a better person, they bring us to our knees in prayer and worship, and God uses them in our lives to shape us and mold us into the person He created us to be.

Dave and I wanted to have a big family when we got married. We said we wanted 7. Well after our 4th child was born, Kenny (now 1) my husband said “honey 4 is the new 7!!!” We were exhausted, overwhelmed and learning how to handle (more like crowd control) our 4 since we had 3 less than a year apart. We had a newborn, a 1 ,2 and 8 year old. When I look back, I have no idea how we did it. LOL We did, somehow. The grace of God carried us through. I was going to get my tubes tied and for some reason we felt like that is not what God wanted for us to do. We felt like we were violating our conscience. Now a year later, we are hoping to find out we are pregnant with our 5th soon. God worked in our lives, to change our hearts and show us how wrong we were to dictate what only He should be in charge of. He led us to His word and allowed us to see how wring it is to try to limit the number of blessings He gives us, as to say “do not bless me too much, I know if I leave it up to you Lord…you will just bless away!!!”

I’ve had a lot of people tell me I’m crazy to want to have another child and that I must never want to sleep again. I’ve had people say “WHOA” or “GOOD GRIEF WOMAN”…or they simply stare at me with the “WHY???????????” look!

The right PERSPECTIVE!

Children are gifts and rewards from God, not burdens. They are not just a result of sexual intercourse. Nowadays, man wants to control conception (like he wants to dictate everything else that happens in his life, no surprise there!) by abortion, using fertility treatment or even natural family planning methods of counting your fertile days, etc, but the Bible teaches that conception is truly a gift from the Creator, YHWH. Who decides how full your quiver is? I’m here to suggest that you allow the Creator and the originator of life to continue doing what He’s always done best. He knows our days (Psalm 139:16) He knows the plans for each one of those days (Jeremiah 29:11) He knows what we will come up against and gives us a measure of faith to use to help us (Hebrews 11:1) He promises to help us in our time of need and exhaustion (Matthew 11:28).

 If we truly love the Lord and Honor Him and His word we need to be going to Him with this decision just like we do with all the other decisions of our lives (hopefully). A lot of people trust that God can answer their questions regarding jobs, schools, homes, mission trips, friends or finances but they don’t trust God to show them the plan He has for their lives in this area. This is one of those areas we JUST don’t give over to the Lord because ohhh goodness we will be like the Duggars, if we just let God do His thing! After all, God loves children…us? Hmmm not so much, and if we give Him free reigns then He will just bless away, heaven forbid.

I can think of countless people who have told me “I wish we had decided to have more children!” but their child-bearing years are long gone. Society seems to dictate how many kids we can have based on our income or status in the community, etc, but why is no one asking God what His plan is? Forget about the job you have or the paycheck you don’t have or the house you live in (or don’t live in) or the stress you have. God is the provider…He will never bring children into a christian home and NOT provide for them. See, God doesn’t have the duty to provide for unbelievers. He does for His children, not because we deserve it but because He said he would! If we claim to be His children why then, aren’t we taking Him at His word…oh ye of little faith?

Matthew 6:25“For this reason I say to you, do not be worried about your life, as to what you will eat or what you will drink; nor for your body, as to what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? 26“Look at the birds of the air, that they do not sow, nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not worth much more than they? 27“And who of you by being worried can add a single hour to his life? 28“And why are you worried about clothing? Observe how the lilies of the field grow; they do not toil nor do they spin, 29yet I say to you that not even Solomon in all his glory clothed himself like one of these. 30“But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which is alive today and tomorrow is thrown into the furnace, will He not much more clothe you? You of little faith! 31“Do not worry then, saying, ‘What will we eat?’ or ‘What will we drink?’ or ‘What will we wear for clothing?’ 32“For the Gentiles eagerly seek all these things; for your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things. 33“But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.

      34“So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

God does give us the responsibility to manage our life and to make decisions in our life so there is no shame in deciding how many children to have…or is there? God never gave us autonomy. Everything we do MUST be IN His will or we are simply out of His will. God never gave us the green light to be god of our own life and to go about our own interest and agenda. I’m seeing it demonstrated that the family that has 1-3 children are looked at as more responsible than the family that has 4-18 children…Those families that are bigger are seen as families who their homes MUST be a mess, they must eat canned food because the economy is unforgiving right now and they are surely just making it through…just struggling.

I am here to tell you it is NOT SO! We have 4 so far and even though there are seasons of feeling sick because of pregnancies, exhaustion with a newborn etc…that is not the way we conduct our lives. We live fully and solely for the Lord and strive to teach our children to fear and love the Creator with all their being.

So let’s stop playing God and allow God to do what He does best. Be GOD. We can’t claim to “trust” Him in all areas of our lives if we are not trusting Him in the area of child rearing. That is called hypocrisy my friends.

Resources:

Is Birth Control Biblical?

Serene ChaOs!

How do you do it?

The most common question Dave & I get asked everywhere we go with the kids. I don’t think it’s so much that we have 4 (we honestly don’t think 4 is THAT many kids) but the fact that they are so close together. My answer is, I honestly don’t know! I get up in the morning, fix breakfast, go over scripture with Franky or play scriptionaire on my Iphone before he has to go off to school (YUCK). The girls get up and I change them and get them ready for the day. I make sure the hubby’s uniform is ironed & ready to go…and my day starts. I run at the speed of life! Same routine everyday. I homeschool our 2 & 3 years old (YES, I teach them from colors and alphabet to biology and 3D shapes…we have a very high standard when it comes to education in this home, my son was learning Reformed Theology, Exegesis and Hermeneutics last year in 3rd grade) academics in the morning…along with the daily lessons God presents us with on patience, forgiveness, love, perseverance, obedience…sharing. Snack time and then, it is off to make lunch. After lunch they all go down for a nap and while they nap I cook dinner and occasionally blog. Afternoons are more creative. Arts and crafts, baking, painting, music (I play classical music for the girls…they love Mozart & Beethoven)…after that we go exploring outside. I lay a blanket on the grass or our drive way and I teach them about the heavens and our beautiful creator while they watch the clouds fly by. They love it! They ask me often, mommy are we going to watch the clouds today? It is the simple things I want them to cherish, the simple yet beautiful things I want them to soak in and bring life to their heart. When we come inside it’s shower time for all 3, dinner time followed by veggietales, bible stories and night-time prayers. All that while dealing with potty training, cleaning, doing a million dishes (we don’t use a dishwasher, I AM the dishwasher! LOL), organizing ( I am OCD about a clean and organized home…I am working on it!!!), laundry, folding clothes, putting away clothes, ironing and everything that happens unexpectedly during the course of our day. A gazillion Cheerios on the floor that have been conveniently stepped on, water leaking from sippy cups, the girls fighting, Kenny opening drawers or getting into the bathroom to unroll the toilet paper and drag it around the house!

I don’t know how I do it! Nevermind, I do…the GRACE of God and my AMAZING husband. God blessed me with a man that loves being a part of their lives, changing diapers, making them breakfast, changing them or simply laying on the floor and letting them jump on him like a bounce house! 🙂

God not only gets me through the day but allows me to enjoy my role as a wife and mommy to these precious 4 kids. Only a crazy person (or one that has been radically changed by the love of God) would think of having more! LOL Yet, we are. Only God could have done the work in our hearts to change it from “we are DONE!” to I must be obedient to the call…and allow God to guide us into how many children we should have. I had an IUD on. After God working in our hearts and much study of the word, we decided we could not violate our conscience anymore and to remove it. If we are going to claim to trust God then we MUST hand over to Him every single area of our lives, holding NOTHING back! So we stepped out of the boat and into the unknown…we know who holds out future and He has better plans for us than we do for ourselves. 🙂 I don’t just make it through my day, I am present and enjoying every moment. Not to say I don’t have days where I pray “Lord just let me get through today ALIVE!”. There are days where I either feel awful physically, mentally or I have just lost sight of the eternal and drowned in the temporal. I know what kind of day I have had depending on how I feel at night. When my head hits the pillow & I have had a day where I’m not present, my priorities as messed up (usually leads me to have a very bratty and ungrateful attitude!), I know it. The weight of my conviction falls on me (in the manner of a dump truck of guilt!), as I examine my day. I go over the things I did that I want to continue to do. The things I did and do NOT want to repeat tomorrow or the things I didn’t do and I want to start. I want a life without regrets, I don’t want to look back and say OHHH MAN, I MISSED IT! I SHOULD HAVE…blah blah blah. I want to continuously examine my parenting to ensure I am right on target with what God expects of me as a godly mother. My home is only explained as serene chaos…and I love it!

‘The will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you.”

“Lord, I beg you… do not let me mess this up!”

As I look out my window, in the rare stillness of my home as tears flow I pray “Lord, I beg you… do not let me mess this up!”

Lately I have seen the big picture clearer and much BIGGER than ever before. The weight of my responsibility is sinking in. I have to raise these 4 kids (hopefully more) in the fear and admonition of the Lord? Me? As a homeschooler, I have to teach them everything they should know? I must show my kids the Gospel? Not just “share” the gospel, bible songs and bible stories…but SHOW them Christ?! Christ through me. It is my responsibility to cultivate in my girls a pure heart in order to be a devoted disciple of the Lord, develop a virtuous character so that they may be excellent wives themselves one day. WOW! Me? Maybe God messed this one up! He surely did not pick an accredited (LOL) and qualified being for this task when He chose me. The thought of what my call is, my mission field within my home brings me to my knees. I have to live in the presence of the Lord daily, prayer walking my day if I want to live excellently. Nothing is hindering my walk with Him right now, I am so dependent on Him I simply can’t afford unconfessed sin or a pinch or self-reliance. I need Him. I need all of Him and desperately because I can’t do it. When I realized this I cried to my husband…I told Him…Honey what if I mess this up? What if I mess them up? What if they don’t learn what they are supposed to? What if they don’t walk with the Lord when they grow up? His response, “honey, you are IN the center of God’s will…whatever He wills for these children He will give you the strength to accomplish.” I am so in love with that man. He is the one I run to when I am fearful…He is the one I run to when I need someone to show me Christ.

As I have been in prayer all day, going back and forth between trusting Him and His sovereignty and worrying. He gently reminds me that I can’t! That’s right! I can’t! Not without Him, not on my own…I need Him. This is exactly where He wants me. Here I am worried about where I should be, what I might be missing and He whispers, YOU ARE RIGHT WHERE I WANT YOU. I smiled and my eyes watered again. I realized that in my weakness, He is strong. If He called me, He will equip me! If He entrusted these precious blessings to us is because He has an amazing plan for their lives and He will use me to bring that to fruition. I am not adequate, or equipped, or super intelligent, nor a theological genius…but I AM exactly what He wants me to be. Beautifully broken. Broken at His feet, fully dependent on Him for every breath I take. When I step back and look at the big picture, it is terrifying. All they need to learn, all they need to be, all God has planned for them clashes with everything I am NOT. It doesn’t add up until’ I survey the wonderous cross. I have learned so much from these little ones. I have learned patience, perseverance, faith, unconditional love, forgiveness and how to live on my knees. God is using me to shape and mold them into the godly young men and women they will be one day and using them to sanctify me. To change me and mold me into the woman He created me to be. It’s a difficult and at times painful process, yet very necessary in the life of the saint.

Doubt in our ability to fulfill our call is satan’s number one tool. If he can get you to doubt, he can bring in fear and if fear is fed it is paralyzing. THAT is what the enemy wants. To paralyze you and make you ineffective. In times like this, we have to draw near to God and cling as for dear life to all the wonderful promises in His word. He never said being a wife and mother would be a breeze, He just promised to be with you every step of the way. 🙂 Motherhood isn’t glamorous, it isn’t hip BUT it pays with hugs and kisses! At times we may feel it is a thankless job at best and an insignificant one at worst. God says it is THE best job a woman can have. He called the woman who is a devoted homemaker, a virtuous woman. How we feel about our role, as real as it may be  is unreliable at best. So we must meditate on how God feels and has said about our role.

When I am scared, I will run to God. When I feel inadequate, it is He who validates me. When I feel I can’t do this, it is Him to carries me through. When I am uncertain about the future, I remind myself I am the daughter of the King…The creator of the Universe hold my past, present and future in His nail pierced hands. He has my best interest at heart! He called me therefore he will equip me as I abide in Him daily.

Simplicity is beautiful and beauty is in the simple things!

Contrary to what our culture suggests, simplicity is beautiful.

A vivid painting of a country home amidst magnificent mountains. A marvelous sunset…a peaceful meadow…a crystal clear creek…these are a few of the beautiful yet simple things that inspire me, that bring life to my soul.

 I missed it. I missed the era in which women wore those amazingly big and beautiful dresses, when they used a washboard to do their laundry, hung their clothes out in the sun to dry, baked bread from scratch and wore aprons daily. I am that kind of woman…I think I just was born in the wrong era! 🙂 I want to go back, go back to living a simple yet full life. A life where the things that mattered were the things done. A life that embraced simplicity, contentment, hard work and shuns the westernized culture we live in. So, I am going to do it!!! I am buying a washboard along with everything needed to wash our clothes and in the process teach my sweet girls how to be a Prov 31 woman…a hard working woman. It will be such a bonding time for our family. All of us, washing clothes (barely), talking, sharing, growing together in love and grace.

Sometimes the process is more important than the outcome. This is one of those things. I want to impart in them a desire to work with their hands, to love their family and to be willing to go the extra mile to ensure they have the BEST in every area entrusted to her care. I strongly believe we are a society of women who honestly don’t have much of a backbone (me included). I believe this is the way we were raised. We weren’t taught and encouraged to work diligently with our hands passed the point of tiredness for the good of our precious husbands and children. We are a fast food, drive through, I wanted it yesterday kind of society and I want no part in it. It will be hard making this transition but I am committed to go back. To go back to what I believe is the model of a godly woman. A woman who is not stopped by a mere headache but a woman who pushes through and gets the job done because she has to, her family is counting on her. I have to train myself on days that I do not feel particularly well to push through and get it done…not just to make it through but to do my job excellently. I don’t want to make my own bread for the sake of making it, but I want my children to love making things from scratch. I want them to remember mommy wearing an apron, singing songs about Jesus with them while we made homemade bread for when daddy got home from work. THAT, is the kind of legacy I want to leave to my children. They deserve it.

 I want them to be surrounded by beauty…flowers…grass…a beautiful painting that whisks you away into a perfect place or a good piece of music. I want them to find beauty in simple things that we take for granted every single day. I want them to find beauty in the smell of home cooking, in our clothes swaying in the breeze while the warm rays of the sun do their trick, in a meal together. Beauty in simplicity because simplicity is absolutely beautiful. I want the same for my precious husband. I want him to be surrounded by beauty, beauty that inspires him to be the hero of this story…of my story. A candle…a rose…a a good ol’ book. A woman by his side that offers beauty to him by her quiet and gentle spirit. By her sacrificial love and patience, her motivation and endurance. I don’t want my family to miss it. I don’t want to get so caught up in this world I miss the greater life God intended for us to live. I want to live fully…every moment…every breath and find beauty in the simplest things because someone who finds beauty in simplicity is NEVER disappointed. 🙂  So, I am going back! Are you coming with me? Sometimes less is more. Less tv, less magazines, less business, less worry and more simplicity…more time to soak in the precious moments that only happen once. Our precious little ones grow up so fast. Stop and soak in the moment you have with them. Put the dishes down…stop worrying about how everything should be and embrace what everything IS, ohhh and how beautiful it is indeed. Love on them, spend time with them, teach them…train them up in the ways of the Lord. YES, it will take twice as long to get things done but so what?! They are more important, the journey is more important. Life is a journey NOT a destination. Our role is to be the home administrator…what are we actively doing to bring our family together? Create moments they will never forget! Bring a blanket outside on a starry night and have dinner under the stars and talk about the heavens and the creator of it all, right in your backyard. Grab a sheet and 4 chairs and make a tent for your kiddos, sit under it with them and have lunch…another opportunity to shepherd their heart. Make themed dinners. Like Noah’s Arc…buy the disposable plates and animal decorations (you can even find them at the dollar store), talk about Noah and the flood…There are so many things we can do to shepherd our little ones right to our Savior’s arms. We just need to get our priorities straight. Our house, our dishes, our car, our laundry is not our priority, our children should be. Simplicity will allow me to spend more time with them. It will allow me to make God real to them as I work to build them up as young ladies and men of integrity and character. Hard working, loving, devoted, sold out for Christ!

Live fully and be present wherever you are! ❤

Desiring to be a Woman after God’s own Heart.

So, I took the a test. A unique personality test that will give your insight as to how you learn and connect with God and what Biblical character you are most like. Mine: David! I was in tears as I read my results…when I first become a Christian, I was crying to God one night, asking Him to forgive me and I asked why did He choose me? Why me out of billions in this world. His reply…you have the heart of David. 🙂 I had no idea what that meant at the time…now I know. A heart that He gave me. Thankful He chose me, redeemed me and is now sanctifying me for His glory!

My learning style…

The verbal style involves both the written and spoken word. If you use this style, you find it easy to express yourself, both in writing

and verbally. You love reading and writing. You like playing on the meaning or sound of words, such as in tongue twisters, rhymes,

limericks, and the like. You like reading, and do it regularly. You know the meaning of many words, and regularly make an effort to find

the meaning of new words. You use these words, as well as phrases you have picked up recently, when talking to others. Pursuits that

use the verbal style include public speaking, debating, politics, writing, and journalism.

You may use phrases like these:

Tell me word for word…

Let’s talk later.

The word you’re looking for is…

I hear you but I’m not sure I agree.

Let me spell it out for you.

In other words…

You are a reader, try the techniques that involve reading and writing. Find ways to incorporate more speaking and writing in these

techniques like storytelling, teaching, and journaling.

How I connect with God…

People on the Creation Pathway have a passionate ability to connect with God when they are experiencing the world He made.

Being outdoors replenishes and energizes them. If they are cooped up inside too long their soul starts to feel stale. They see God in the

spectacular but also in the everyday outside world. People on this pathway need to spend large chunks of time outdoors, often

praying or meditating. These people need to guard against using this pathway as an escape when people disappoint. They also need

to guard against thinking that they don’t need the church because they can worship God alone in nature.

David’s personality.

David was passionate, strong, creative, and loved. He was the king of Israel for forty years, and the Bible describes David as a man

after God’s own heart (1 Samuel 13:14). David was promised that the Savior of the world would be his descendant. David was a

shepherd, musician, worshipper, and courageous warrior. He trusted in the sovereignty of God, evident by his decision to face a giant as

a kid. He survived the chase of a mad king, defended his people against many nations, and prevailed against an attempted

coup from one of his own sons. He wrote poems and songs of worship that fill the book of Psalms in the Bible. Despite lapses in his

judgment and moral behavior, David pursued godliness and faithfulness throughout his life. He left a lasting legacy of bold faith

and obedience. If you have a David personality, you are warm, compassionate, intuitive, and expressive. You love the stillness and

quiet. Creativity is your lifeblood and you have the ability to feel things deeply. However, you can be plagued with self-doubt. You are

motivated to search and to find your identity in order to express who you are and find meaning and significance. You surround yourself

with things that you think are compelling and beautiful. For you, to create is to live! Establishing a true, honest, and unique persona is

important to you. Because you have the capacity to see what others miss, you sometimes feel out of the mainstream and mistakenly feel

less competent socially. Sometimes this power to empathize and see the uncommon thread in things can lead you to see yourself as one

of a kind. You are abundantly and intuitively creative, expressing the personal and the universal, possibly in a work of art. You are

inspired, self-renewing, and regenerating. You have an uncanny ability to turn ordinary life experiences into something profound and

valuable. At your best, you are honest with yourself and those around you. You can address an issue, problem, or feeling without

overreacting and without others feeling like you are being patronizing. You love to discover the truth in each experience. When

you are at your best, you are looking for God and His creative power even in tough situations, conflicts, and mistakes. You are

able to heighten reality through passionate feelings and imagination. Harnessing your feelings can be hard for you and when you

cannot control them, you are prone to blame and hold grudges. In these times, it is wise to trust God in your hurts and to allow him to

make things right. Try to separate godly conviction from undue anger at yourself. Move toward right thinking and wise living by

reading Psalms and Proverbs and refuse to get stuck in the past. If you become attached to longing and disappointment, you may not be

able to recognize the many treasures in your life. You have the tendency to become envious of another person’s talent,

success, good fortune, wealth, recognition, honor, or advantages. You can become preoccupied with a sense of discontent that is

primarily based on what others have. Unlike covetousness or greed, envy is fundamentally comparative in nature. If you are like David,

here are some thoughts for you:

– Because you are a creative at heart, find ways to make some of the things you must do in your

everyday life fun, creative, and playful.

– If the work you do for an income is not particularly creative, be sure to take regular portions of your free time for ideas that you have

to take hold.

– It is very important for you to develop a good habit of sleep, eating, exercise, and work. Be disciplined in these four areas.

They will make a huge difference in your life.

– Remind yourself of this truth: God has made you perfectly and has given you everything you need. You are capable and loveable—just

as you are.

– You must address your tendency to be envious head-on! First, make a list of things that you are grateful for. Write it big, then post

that list where you see it every day. Next, list some things you admire in someone else around you. Over the next year, work to develop

those same qualities in yourself.

– For more about your personality type take a look at Chapter 9 of Frequency by Monvee co-founders Eric Parks and Casey Bankord

Job, Sarah, Hagar, Leah, and Eve.

You tend to be more serious, reserved, and withdrawn. You are insightful, idealistic, and often more interested in the world

of imagination than in everyday life.

You tend to be analytical and objective.

You are focused and you persevere.

The real agenda behind the PuBLiC School System…Shocking.

“I am convinced that the battle for humankind’s future must be waged and won in the public school classrooms by teachers who correctly perceive their role as the new proselytizers of a new faith, a religion of humanity. These teachers must embody the same selfless dedication as the most rabid fundamentalist preacher. The classroom must and will become an arena of conflict between the old and the new―the rotting corpse of Christianity, together with all its adjacent evils and misery, and the new faith (humanism), resplendent in its promise.”

John Dunphy, “A Religion for the New Age,” Humanist Magazine

“I think that the most important factor moving us toward a secular society has been the educational factor. Our schools may not teach Johnny how to read properly, but the fact that Johnny is in school until he is 16 tends toward the elimination of religious superstition. The average American child now acquires a high school education, and this militates against Adam and Eve and all other myths of alleged history.”

P. Blanchard ‘The Humanist” 1983

“Education is thus a most powerful ally of Humanism, and every American public school is a school of Humanism. What can theistic Sunday-schools, meeting for an hour once a week and teaching only a fraction of the children, do to stem the tide of a five—day program of humanistic teaching.”

Charles Francis Potter “Humanism: A New Religion”

“What the Church has been for medieval man, the public school must become for democratic and rational man. God would be replaced by the concept of the public good.”

Horace Mann, Father of public education

“There is no God and there is no soul. Hence, there are no needs for the props of traditional religion. With dogma and creed excluded, immutable truth is also dead and buried. There is no room for fixed, natural laws or moral absolutes.”

John Dewey, Father of modern American public education

“The schools cannot allow parents to influence the kind of values-education their children receive in school; that is what is wrong with those who say there is a universal system of values. Our (humanistic) goals are incompatible with theirs. We must change their values.”

Paul Haubner, specialist for the NEA

“The major function of the school is the social orientation of the individual. It must seek to give him understanding of the transition to a new social order.”

Willard Givens, Executive Secretary, NEA

“Dramatic changes in the way we will raise our children in the year 2000 are indicated, particularly in terms of schooling…We will need to recognize that the so-called basic skills, which currently represent nearly the total effort in elementary schools, will be taught in one-quarter of the present school day…When this happens- and it’s near- the teacher can rise to his true calling. More than a dispenser of information, the teacher will be a conveyor of values…We will be agents of change.”

Catherine Barrett , former NEA president

“Every child in America who enters school at the age of five is mentally ill, because he comes to school with allegiance toward our elected officials, toward our founding fathers, toward our institutions, toward the preservation of this form of government. . .patriotism, nationalism, sovereignty… . All of that proves the children are sick, because the truly well individual is one who has rejected all of those things and is what I would call the true international child of the future.”

Dr. William Pierce (Harvard University) in a Lecture to 200 teachers 1987

“The educational philosophy of today becomes the political policy of tomorrow.”

Abraham Lincoln
After reading these quotes I dare you to tell me the Lord is ok with a christian sending a child to a public school or ANY other institution for that matter?! You can’t! He is not ok with it. HE WOULD NEVER be ok with sending our children to be brainwahsed. YOU better wake up church!

 

A disciple is not above his teacher, but everyone who is perfectly trained will be like his teacher.  Luke 6:40

 

Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God, the LORD is one.

Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength.

These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts.

Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.

Deuteronomy 6:4-9 (NKJV)

To train a child: Who’s responsibility is it anyway?

Article by: Matthew James

“Then Manoah intreated the LORD, and said, O my Lord, let the man of God which thou didst send come again unto us, and teach us what we shall do unto the child that shall be born” (Judges 13:8). Manoah was the father of Samson, who was a mighty judge over Israel. Before Samson was born, an angel of the Lord appeared to Manoah’s wife and told her that she would conceive and bear a son who would begin to deliver Israel out of the hand of the Philistines. When Manoah’s wife came to him and told him what the angel of God had told her, he prayed to God and said, “teach us what we shall do unto the child that shall be born.” Manoah did not go to the world or the philosophers and psychologists of his day to find out how to raise his son. He went to God, the One who is the source of all truth and wisdom. May we as Christians follow Manoah’s example and seek to be taught of God as to how to raise and teach our children. It is no secret that recent generations have become increasingly wicked against God. This is true not only of the world, but of God’s own people. Many professing believers have forsaken God’s ways and followed after the ways of the world. Hosea 4:6 says, “My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge: because thou hast rejected knowledge, I will also reject thee, that thou shalt be no priest to me: seeing thou hast forgotten the law of thy God, I will also forget thy children.” This passage applies today just as much as it did in the days of Hosea. We are witnessing the destruction of God’s people because of their rejection of knowledge and truth. This did not happen overnight, but slowly from one generation to the next. Christian parents are failing to instill in their children the ways and precepts of God, and we are seeing the result of it. Home education is an important subject because it is one area where there is a great lack of knowledge among God’s people, yet it is the means whereby future generations can be preserved in righteousness. Proverbs 22:6 teaches us to “Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.” Proverbs 29:17 says, “Correct thy son, and he shall give thee rest; yea, he shall give delight unto thy soul.” There are clearly great blessings that result from the scriptural training and education of children. It is not only a great blessing to parents who train their children properly, but to others as well, including churches and society in general. However, it is not an easy task to train children, and in this important work we must search the scriptures for guidance. We must seek the leadership of the Holy Spirit and look to God for understanding as did Manoah. Let me also say here that our subject is the education of children, not the education of adults. There is a fundamental difference between public schools where children go to receive training and instruction, and colleges or schools of higher learning where adults (who should already be trained) go to be taught a trade or a skill whereby they may adequately provide for the needs of the home. Christian home educators are not against education, but the indoctrination and bad influences of the public and private school systems. The Authority and Responsibility of Parents The first reason that I believe in home schooling is because God has placed children under the authority of their parents, and therefore it is the parent’s responsibility to educate them. Parents should seek to guide their children to a life pleasing to God. This entails teaching their children what their purpose for existence is, what their relationship to God is, and what their relationship to their fellow man is. Ephesians 6:4 reads, “ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.” Notice who is addressed here, it’s “ye fathers.” It is not “ye schools,” “ye daycares,” or “ye babysitters,” but “ye fathers.” It is the father’s responsibility to “bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.” Authority comes from God. Proverbs 6:20 says, “My son, keep thy father’s commandment, and forsake not the law of thy mother.” Similarly we read in Colossians 3:20, “Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord.” Children are to be obedient to their parents because God has placed them under the parent’s authority. The parent’s word is law to the children. This point is critical and must be taken seriously because the parent’s authority comes from God. Nobody has any authority whatsoever unless God gives it to them (John 19:11), and God specifically gave authority to parents to train and educate their children (Proverbs 22:6). This is why Manoah wanted to know how to raise his son. He understood it was his responsibility to do so and took it seriously. He did not want to dishonor or belittle the law of God. The authority that God gives is non-transferable. If God tells us to do something, then we cannot tell someone else to do it in our place. Could the members of a church decide to hire professionals to do all or part of their evangelism? Certainly not! God told the church to go into all the world and make disciples. There is no institution that can do the church’s work for them. The same is true of the home. There is no institution that can adequately do the parent’s work for them. In addition, when God gives authority He requires accountability. Thus parents are accountable to God for what they allow their children to do. A good example of this concerns Eli the priest. He learned that his sons were committing terrible sins against God. I Samuel 2:22 says, “Now Eli was very old, and heard all that his sons did unto all Israel; and how they lay with the women that assembled at the door of the tabernacle of the congregation.” Eli found out what his sons were doing and told them to stop (I Samuel 2:23-25), but in verse 25 we see that his sons did not obey him. The Lord ended up punishing Eli for the sins of his children because he did not make them stop. “For I have told him that I will judge his house for ever for the iniquity which he knoweth; because his sons made themselves vile, and he restrained them not.” (I Samuel 3:13). Eli told his children to cease their wickedness; but he did not exercise his authority to restrain them, and consequently God held Eli accountable for this. Likewise, God will hold us accountable if we fail to exercise our authority over our children. If we send them to public or private schools we will be held accountable for everything that they see, hear, and learn there because we are responsible for their training. If our children are taught evolution or humanism in school, God will hold us accountable for it, just as if we taught them these things ourselves. If our children are exposed to pornography, drugs, profanity, homosexuality, etc. at school or other places, we as parents will give an account as to why we sent our children into such an environment. Furthermore in a school setting, teachers must be given a certain authority over their pupils in order to teach them. This means that children who are sent to schools are taken from under the authority of their parents (where God placed them) and placed under the authority of a teacher. This is confusing to children. No matter how good the teacher may be, it is inevitable that the teacher and the parents will contradict each other in many areas. This is especially true since the teacher works for the school and not for the parents. It is dangerous for parents to surrender control over their children’s education this way. The school teacher is not the authority that God ordained to be over our children. Moreover, the education of children is not the government’s responsibility. God never gave this authority to the government. The mandate that God gave to civil government is summed up in Romans 13:3-4, “For rulers are not a terror to good works, but to the evil. Wilt thou then not be afraid of the power? do that which is good, and thou shalt have praise of the same: For he is the minister of God to thee for good. But if thou do that which is evil, be afraid; for he beareth not the sword in vain: for he is the minister of God, a revenger to execute wrath upon him that doeth evil.” The government has no business in social programs such as welfare, social security, or education. The government’s purpose is to simply enforce God’s law and be a terror to evildoers. The education of children is not the church’s responsibility either. The commission that God gave to churches is found in Matthew 28:19-20, “Go ye therefore, and teach all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost: Teaching them to observe all things whatsoever I have commanded you: and, lo, I am with you alway, even unto the end of the world. Amen.” We certainly ought to take our children to church and our children ought to see us faithfully serving the Lord in church, but the mandate to educate our children does not belong to the church but to parents in the home. When God gives authority, He gives it for a specific purpose, and the authority that God gives to men has a limited jurisdiction. No one has all authority except for God. According to His word, the education of children falls under the jurisdiction of the home; not the jurisdiction of the government, the church, or any school. The Perpetuity and Propagation of the Truth The second reason that I believe in home schooling is because it is God’s first plan for the perpetuity and propagation of the truth. In the New Testament, the Great Commission (Matthew 28:19-20) was given to the church and is God’s plan for the propagation of the truth, yet the home was instituted before the church (this does not diminish the Great Commission in any way). God’s word tells us in Deuteronomy 6:4-9, “Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God is one LORD: And thou shalt love the LORD thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might. And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart: And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up. And thou shalt bind them for a sign upon thine hand, and they shall be as frontlets between thine eyes. And thou shalt write them upon the posts of thy house, and on thy gates.” We note that it is our responsibility as parents to make sure that we teach our children God’s word so that future generations do not forget God and forsake His law. “Beware lest thou forget the LORD” (Deuteronomy 6:12). God puts children in homes for this very reason. As far as children are concerned, all education should be subjective to the scriptures. In other words, as we teach our children things that are secular in nature; it should be from the viewpoint of God’s word and in a Christian light. Secular education that is not overshadowed by God’s word will not be good for any child, but will simply teach them to be humanistic in their thinking. Biblical Separation The third reason that I believe in home schooling is because of the Bible doctrine of separation. II Corinthians 6:14-18 says, “Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness? And what concord hath Christ with Belial? or what part hath he that believeth with an infidel? And what agreement hath the temple of God with idols? for ye are the temple of the living God; as God hath said, I will dwell in them, and walk in them; and I will be their God, and they shall be my people. Wherefore come out from among them, and be ye separate, saith the Lord, and touch not the unclean thing; and I will receive you, And will be a Father unto you, and ye shall be my sons and daughters, saith the Lord Almighty.” God’s word plainly teaches that we have nothing in common with the world and that we should not have fellowship with unbelievers. I John 2:15 says, “Love not the world, neither the things that are in the world. If any man love the world, the love of the Father is not in him.” God’s people are not of this world. We should not think or act like the world, and we certainly should not train up our children in the ways of the world. It’s not that we should isolate ourselves from the world, for we are placed here for a reason. We are the salt and light of the earth. But we are the salt and light of the earth only if we are separate from the world by living according to God’s word. We have influence on the people of the world if we do things God’s way. Therefore we should be governed by His word alone and not the vain philosophies of men. If we are doing what the Bible teaches, we will be hated of the world. Christ said in John 15:19, “If ye were of the world, the world would love his own: but because ye are not of the world, but I have chosen you out of the world, therefore the world hateth you.” The public school system has now come to represent gross immorality and humanism. God’s people should be peculiar and separate from such institutions that openly oppose the things of God and come out from among them. Would we support other institutions that oppose God, such as the American Civil Liberties Union, National Organization for Women, Planned Parenthood, etc? I would hope not, for it would violate the Scriptural principles of separation. Psalm 1:1 says, “Blessed is the man that walketh not in the counsel of the ungodly.” The word ‘counsel’ has to do with teaching. We should not walk in the teachings of the ungodly. Jeremiah 10:2 reads, “Thus saith the LORD, Learn not the way of the heathen.” This is easy to understand. Learning has to do with education, does it not? In Proverbs 19:27 we read, “Cease, my son, to hear the instruction that causeth to err from the words of knowledge.” We should not heed instruction that is contrary to God’s word. The bottom line is our children should not be educated by the world. Separation from the world will also protect our children from evil influences. I Corinthians 15:47 says, “Be not deceived: evil communications corrupt good manners.” It’s no wonder that most children today have no manners. They have been corrupted by evil communications. James 4:4 reads, “Ye adulterers and adulteresses, know ye not that the friendship of the world is enmity with God? whosoever therefore will be a friend of the world is the enemy of God.” God’s people have no business being friends with the world. Take note also that Christian schools can have just as many bad influences as public schools. Even though they may not teach atheism and liberalism, they are full of children who are worldly. In many cases, the children who get expelled from public schools for being a problem end up in Christian schools. It is the responsibility of parents to guard their children against these evil associations. There is nothing wrong with our children having friends; however it is foolish for parents to allow their children to make friends of the world. Failure to separate from the world will lead to future problems for both parents and children alike. Galatians 6:8 reads, “For he that soweth to his flesh shall of the flesh reap corruption; but he that soweth to the Spirit shall of the Spirit reap life everlasting.” Modern secular education in schools is at best, fleshly, and at worst, Satanic. There is nothing spiritual about it. This is the problem. How can we think that as Christian parents we are going to “un-teach” all the worldly things our children are being taught for thirty to forty hours each week in school? If parents spent an hour a day in Bible study with their children (and most don’t do this), it would still be insufficient to counter everything their children are hearing in school. Having to un-teach children what they are learning is also counter productive and a waste of precious time and energy. The best thing to do is to have our children at home under our guidance until they leave home. This is the way God intended for children to learn. God Instituted the Home The fourth reason that I believe in home schooling is because God instituted the home (Genesis 2:18-24), but He did not institute schools for children. Many parents think that public schools ought to be a fundamental part of society, but the Scriptures do not teach this. The home and family are a fundamental part of society because God is the one who instituted the home and family. Civil government is a fundamental part of society because God instituted civil government. But did God institute the public school system? Did God tell us to send our children there to receive an education? By no means! Schools for children are neither necessary nor good for society. Although schools for adults have been around for some time, the public education of children is a relatively new invention. Society has been brainwashed into thinking that public education is the only way, though it is not according to God’s word. Home school is the only scriptural way for a child to be educated. Any institutions, public or private, that substitute for the home are contrary to God’s revealed will. If we think about it, we can see that public and private schools exist only because there is a demand for them with modern day parents. Even many Christian parents are living for worldly success and material gain rather than for God. They are too busy to bother training their children and are happy for someone else to educate them. But we as Christians should never be guilty of placing material gain or personal success before our spiritual duty (Matthew 16:26). I realize that not all Christian parents who send their children to schools are trying to avoid their responsibility. Many are simply ignorant as to what their responsibility is, and they think that they are supposed to send their children to public school because that is what society has taught them. It can be difficult to accept God’s word when it contradicts what one has previously been taught, however “let God be true, but every man a liar” (Romans 3:4). Common Objections to Home Schooling In conclusion, I’d like to deal with some common arguments against home schooling. First, I have heard it stated that home schooling does not prepare children for the “real world.” Many people think that children must be placed in a public school so that they learn how to deal with public society. What they do not realize is that schools maintain a synthetic environment. Where else in society do you find thirty people who are nearly the same age sitting in a classroom together and listening to a teacher? Public schools do not prepare children for the “real world.” Why is it that so many high school graduates cannot make it through college? They have not been prepared! Why is it that so many of them cannot hold down a job? A large part of them cannot even read nor do basic math. They are simply not prepared for the “real world.” According to the National Home Education Research Institute (NHERI), home educated children do not generally encounter these problems. The truth is that home schooled children are the ones who are best prepared for society. NHERI has found that home schooled students do well in college, on the job, and in society in general. In a 2003 report their research showed that 71% of adults, who were home schooled as children, were active in some ongoing community service, compared to only 37% of similarly aged U.S. adults. They also found that for all civic activities (such as voting or supporting a political cause), and at all age groups, the home educated adults were more civically involved than the general population. Another NHERI survey of adults who were home educated found that none of them were unemployed or on welfare. This shows that parents, not schools, are the ones who are effectively able to prepare future generations for society. The second argument that I’ve heard is that it is not good for children to be at home so much of the time. They say that children need more social influences than what they get in the home. However home educators do not stay locked up behind closed doors all the time (although this is how some would like to portray us). The answer to this is simple. Where were Adam’s social needs met? When God created Adam and said that it was not good for man to be alone, what did God do? He gave Adam a wife. Our social needs are met in the home, as well as our physical, mental, and spiritual needs. Besides this, our children can have plenty of friends at church and among other Christian families. They will go places and do things with their parents, and they will have just as much exposure to the world as is necessary. Perhaps the real reason for this argument is that parents do not want their children to be different from the world. Perhaps they want their children to fit in and be popular. Perhaps they want their children to be sports stars and great achievers in school. Yet if we live godly, we will be hated of the world. We cannot serve God and mammon both. The third argument I’ve heard is that we need to send our children to school so they can let their light shine. My question is how are they letting their light shine by attending school? Are they standing before the class and giving their testimony? In addition, how many first, second, or third graders are even saved? For that matter, how many high school age children are saved? We have to be saved before our light will shine or before we can witness to others. And if this argument is valid, should we then only send saved children to schools? Why don’t we send our saved children into bars or other places in the world to let their light shine there? The fact is that God never told us to send our children into the world to let their light shine. They are still in training and not emotionally equipped to do this. And though it is many times unwittingly, once we compromise God’s standard, our light is no longer shining for the world to see it. We must do things God’s way, and then our light will shine as a testimony before men. The fourth argument that I’ve often heard is that parents do not feel qualified to home school their children. This argument is largely based on the constant propaganda of the media, school officials, and government officials who contend that parents are not qualified to teach their own children, however this assumption is not based on truth. According to a 1997 report by Dr. Brian Ray of NHERI, home educated students excelled in national standardized achievement exams. This research showed that home school students outscored public school students by 30 to 37 percentile points across all subjects in the K-12 grades. He also found that the education level of the parents had very little impact on the scores of their children. Out of all the home school children surveyed, the children whose parents did not finish high school scored nearly as well as the children whose parents were college graduates. Regardless of the educational achievement of parents, home school children receive a better education than their public school peers. If parents are not qualified to teach their children, then why did God give them children? Why did God then assign the responsibility of education to the parents? This argument is a direct insult to God’s sovereignty. According to this logic, we need something beyond what God has provided in the home. This is wrong. Teaching children is not easy, but the tools that we need are made available to us from God’s word. If He has given us a command, then He is the One we must look to for the strength to fulfill the command. “The just shall live by faith.” (Romans 1:17). If parents want to be obedient to God and educate their children at home, then God will give them the means to do so if they trust in Him. Home school is God’s plan for educating children. It was His design from the beginning. May God grant us the grace to return to the “old paths, where is the good way, and walk therein, and ye shall find rest for your souls” (Jeremiah 6:16).

Perspective…we all need it desperately.

I adore my kids.  There’s nothing that brings more joy to me than seeing these little ones grow up both in wisdom and stature. Seeing them be born and go from crawling to walking from cooing to praying…singing bible songs, wanting to read bible stories. I love seeing God work in their lives from such a young age. If you are one of my regular readers then you know by now that I want nothing more than to live New Testament Christianity. I want to go back to living by the  principles outlined in the Bible…the way I parent my precious blessings is a priority for me. I am committed to schooling (training up) my children to fear and love the Lord all the way through high school. So this post is about our role as a mother…it is a change of perspective I believe we need. Our culture perceives children as another thing on our check list…a “problem”. Ever heard the saying one child one problem, two children 2 problems, no children no problems?! Well I have and that is the way I was raised believe it or not. I wanted 2. No more than two. I can handle two problems, I thought. LOL. Little did I know God was going to waltz into my life and undo me. I am glad he did.It would have been a train wreck! I would have been self centered…I would have never taught my children the Word, Integrity or values. Why? Not because I didn’t want to but because I can’t impart what I don’t possess. My perspective on children has dramatically changed in the past 8 years I have been walking with Jesus. I see my children as Christ sees them. Blessings!

There are days in which I would be lying if I said I didn’t lose perspective on what’s important in my life. As a perfectionist I cringe at the thought of a messy home or dishes piled. God showed me today how much my perspective needs a tune up now and then….

It’s been a while since I’ve worn Kenny.  I used to do it when he was a tiny baby at 5.10 lbs. I loved it. I decided to take him in my sling to the park. The moment was surreal. He snuggled up and enjoyed just being with mommy. I realized how much I missed holding him so close for more than 10 mins at a time. I realized how blessed I am to be his mommy. How merciful God is in allowing me to raise these little ones. He trusted me to mold them and shape them into the men/women they will become one day. How amazing and terrifying at the same time. Me? I have to teach them everything they know? Ohh goodness. I can do nothing more than fall on my knees at the thought of being accountable for 4 little lives (4 so far, we pray God will bless us with more). I think sometimes (more than we wish to admit) we focus on the temporal instead of the eternal. Especially if you have multiple children in the home…it can be described as serene chaos. It is much easier for a mom of 3-4 to focus on the temporal than it is to step back and look at the big picture. I mean after all how can we? Our heads are so buried in the NOW, how do I get through today to worry about the big picture. When we do step back and see the big picture, only regret and guilt set in, so we just stop revising our parenting all together. We decide we are going to get through today and that’s all we can do. At some point we lowered our expectations, and kissed good-bye all the plans we had for training our little ones when they were born and settled for “getting through.”  We set sail through life on our boats (as damaged as it may be) because we don’t see any other way of doing it. Despair and depression set in and now we are far from land…with no map, our boat taking in water…knwoing we need help we cry out to God but the task (changing us, the way we do things) is so gigantic we crawl back on our boat of mediocrity because that’s what we know to do. God is trying to give us His perspective, He is trying to teach us a better way to be a mother. To be the kind of mom who happens to LIVE instead of the one who let’s life happen to her. We (I included) have been caught in the crashing waves of life. Dishes, laundry, cleaning, meals…etc. We end up not living a beautiful, full and glorious life God intended us to live but something we settled for. If that is you beloved, I have news for you…you don’t need to settle for anything LESS than what God said you can be. Changing our perspective is step one in changing the course of our journey. One step at a time. We need to have perspective when we parent…or we will just be parents who react instead of parents who act. Let me explain…if you are waiting around for your children to do something and then react to it that is allowing your child to be in control of what happens. If we are actively parenting (by a daily schedule) then we are in control and we wont be parents who react but who are actively leading their children in this journey called LIFE. I am very guilty of being at times a reactive parent rather than an active one, but God uses those times in my life to show me His way of parenting is a much better way. We need to have perspective as women as well. We are beautiful, every single one of us. Fearfully and wonderfully made. Captivating and adventurous…don’t settle for the lies you have been told on who you are. Let nothing you have done define you. Let who Christ says you ARE permiate your being until’ it reached your very core. THEN, and only then can you find fullness of life. Our identity as women and moms isn’t what we do or what we think we aren’t (beautiful enough, thin enough…rich enough) but who we are in Christ. You are a princess, captivating, beautiful, adventurous…fierce in nature. Dwell on that for a while my sweet friend…

Here’s some perspective…in the midst of the daily grind we can be so overwhelmed we don’t see our little ones as the blessings they truly are. Sometimes it takes something tragic to makes us realize how much we need to cherish each moment with them. What if your child got cancer? Would you change the way you interact with them on a daily basis? Would you do anything different? What if you know he/she only had months to live? Would you say you are parenting with your heart and soul? So many times we take for granted our little ones, we see all the work that they require and fail to see what blessings they truly are.

Bringing joy and beauty to our years. Children are the crown of a godly woman. They rise up and call her blessed as Prov 31 states. But in order for that to happen we must life a life that actively seeks to lead them to God and fully live all the adventures God has for us as a family together. Yes it is work, Yes it is tiring and YES it is even more rewarding. I encourage you to pray the Lord restores to you the Joy of being blessed with little ones if you are just tired and worn out…run to Him who gives rest to the weary. In order to change the next generation we must begin with changing ourselves and that includes our perspective. The way we see things will determine the way we live life. You have the most important job in the world mama. You get to raise the next generation of New Testament Christians. True followers of God, true worshippers right in your very home. God did not entrust those little ones to anyone else. He entrusted them to us and we simply can;t shirk that responsibility to someone else. We ARE accountable for the way we parent. We are accountable for what we inject in them. We are accountable for our attitude toward them.

 

I say, let’s look around and count our blessings…women and children are dying on the other side of the world due to starvation and abuse. How hard do we really have it? Perspective. Thousands of little girls are sold each year as a sex slave. How hard do you have it? Perspective.  Have you gained perspective yet? However much or little we have, we are blessed. We are blessed to be children of God and to be right where we are at.

As mothers, our home is our mission field and our children are the harvest. We need to gain perspective, jump out of the boat and start living the life God intended you to live. A beautiful life of hope, full of adventures and overflowing with love. Our children are such miracles. Our task so important…the way they are raised will determine who they become. You have an opportunity to impact the next generation and it starts with US. We MUST change ourselves in order to be effective parents to our children. As role models of God’s mercy, grace and love always imparting Truth and showing them how to live a life of integrity, honor and excellence.

Life is but a breath…are you breathing well? Are your breaths short and fast or are they long and slow…are you just getting through or are you enjoying the journey. We all get there…the difference is in the HOW…the journey itself. 🙂

Our family motto: “Service before self and excellence in all we do.”

Family scripture: ” As for me and my house, we will serve the LORD.” Joshua 24:15

The Proverbs 31 Woman…A heart matter.

 

Nope! This is not another blog post to guilt trip you. 🙂 Not another blog post to make you feel like a failure…I know the feeling, trust me. This IS a blog post on what Proverbs 31 really means. Anyone can read through it and tell you what the Prov 31 woman DID but few can tell you what it means. For instance…does it mean that we aren’t virtuous women if we don’t wake up at the crack of dawn to cook everything from scratch as she did? Or go far away to buy the ingredients? Hmmm. Maybe we need to hire some maid servants? Yeah…i’m pretty sure that whole thing doesn’t mean what it literally says. Most of scripture is to be interpreted literally by proper interpretation methods (exegesis & hermeneutics), some of scripture is allegorical like the parable of the sower. That is the case of Prov 31. Who is a virtuous woman? Is there a formula? I am going to humbly attempt to answer that for you. 🙂 I will also give you some practical ideas to live out Prov 31 in our modern society.

There is NO formula! There! There’s your long awaited answer. Prov 31 is NOT a list of things you ought to do but of a heart attitude. The heart attitude of a virtuous woman is to die to self and serve, serve humbly, serve those whom she loves the most; her family. When you read prov 31, please understand that this is not a list of things you ought to do (that would be ludicrous! I mean really, we all need to go out and buy a field and plant a vineyard and if we don’t we are not virtuous??? yeah! not so!) instead it shows you the heart, passion and devotion that characterize an extraordinary woman. Virtue, character, devotion, generosity, integrity, faithfulness, submissive, discerning…THIS beautiful ladies is WHAT prov 31 is about. THAT is the heart of the passage. It’s not about a field, or a meal…it’s about what’s most important. THE HEART!

1 Peter 3:3 Your adornment must not be merely external—braiding the hair, and wearing gold jewelry, or putting on dresses; 4but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God.

After all wasn’t martha being a virtuous woman? She was running around doing all the chores, cooking a fantastic meal and yet Jesus said Mary chose what was BEST. Jesus could see her heart…her heart wasn’t on the eternal (spending time with the Lord), it was in the temporal (chores). Not that we don’t want to keep a clean home for we are to be good homemakers (Titus 2), but our focus, the reason that drives us should always be the right one. LOVE! Love for God and love for our family. 🙂

If I can summarize what a virtuous wife is it would be someone who is a woman of integrity, devoted to being a homemaker, generous to neighbors, she is a great influence as a teacher to her children…she is an effective mother & an excellent disciple.

What a wife must understand is that she has the ability to influence her husband for good or for evil (Prov 12:4). How do we do this? Not by harping. 🙂 1 Peter 3:1 In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives, 2as they observe your chaste and respectful behavior. Are you playing the Harp or are you plain harping???

Prov 31:11 The heart of her husband trusts in her, And he will have no lack of gain.

Can your husband trust you? Does he know you will never harm his personal gain? Can your husband leave the checkbook with you and KNOW that the family’s best interest will be done? A virtuous wife will never do anything to threaten what her husband has so diligently worked for. She carefully plans the budget to ensure she protects the money he has brought home. This verse shows they have a relationship completely based on trust. The husband can go away with absolute confidence of her integrity, wisdom and discretion. His comfort is her concern. THAT is an outstanding foundation  for an excellent marriage. He will never have to go out wondering how he will have to make up for the money she spent that should have gone to pay bills. He will never have to work extra in order to cover her indulgences for lack of self control and abundance of selfishness. This is an indication the wife is in charge of all domestic matters. She is in charge of using and accounting for the resources in the home. He is free to give himself to his work, knowing she will be a good steward of all he has provided. In Titus 2 we see the woman also as the ruler of the house. She helps him to profit, not loss. He has enough because she is devoted to his best interest, seeking to do him good because she loves him!

Prov 31:12 She does him good and not evil All the days of her life.

A virtuous woman always has her husband’s best interest at heart. She always seeks to build her husband up. Her desire is to make him the man God created him to be in every area of his life. Through good, bad, sickness, health, having plenty or having little…she is devoted to his well being all the days of her life. Her love and devotion are always set on her husband’s success! A virtuous wife seeks to serve her husband, not to be served. A perfect example of this is found in 1 Peter 3:6 Sarah served Abraham & called him lord. She is committed to her husband and she reveals her virtuous character by her consistent service to him. Her priority is always his comfort, his success, his reputation…this is where she finds delight. Living for him, brings her the utmost joy and happiness.

Spiritually: Because she has his best interest in mind she will confront his sin and his weakness. Lovingly she will be a conscience, she will necessarily be the voice of God, never unkind, always in submission, always coming from a heart that seeks to see him walk closer to the Savior. Confronting his sin and failure is an intricate part of him becoming the man God created him to be. His highest good is her greatest desire. ❤

Prov 31:13 She looks for wool and flax And works with her hands in delight.

She is a devoted homemaker! She is careful to use her time wisely to manage her home accordingly. There is no place for laziness, no place for inactivity. She is full of energy in the duties of her home. Now let me stop here for a minute. This is not to say you just had a c-section, a newborn baby at home and you are up running around doing chores because if not you aren’t being a prov 31 woman. What this is speaking of is a lifestyle. There are reasons, like at risk pregnancy, sickness…etc when you simply can’t manage your home the way you would when the situation changed. 🙂 If your lifestyle would be classified as lazy, just getting through then I encourage you to examine your heart and change your ways. 🙂 Whatever the home requires, that is what she does. The modern day homemaker doesn’t have to craft anything by hand anymore. We can conveniently go to the store and buy clothing. Modern day application of this verse: Go shopping for winter clothing (for the upcoming year)  right after winter, when everything is on sale! The same applies for summer time outfits. If you like decorating your home for holidays (harvest, christmas…etc), buy decoration throughout the year when you find them on sale, save them for future use.  If you need furniture check your local craigslist or pay a visit to second hand stores. Buy used and SAVE the difference. God certainly blesses us so that we bless others, there’s nothing wrong with having nice things we just need to be smarter about the way we shop ladies.  Use coupons and try NOT to pay retail price for anything as much as you can. The prov 31 woman would never give her husband added pressure to provide “nice things”. This verse also shows the CORE of this woman’s being…she does it in delight. She is delighted in the work of her hands because she loves the people she serves. The value of what she does is connected in who she does it for. She denies herself and takes up the most mundane tasks with a great amount of pleasure knowing they come from an overflow of her deep love for her family.

Prov 31:14 She is like merchant ships; She brings her food from afar.

She goes as far as she needs to go to buy the best food for her family. She doesn’t just throw something together, she considers variety and what they would enjoy. Finding the best food at the best prices to bring benefit to her family without breaking her husband’s pocket. 🙂 She indeed is a careful planner. Modern day application: Create a weekly or bi weekly meal plan! We know that organic food is much better because of all the pesticides and harsh chemicals added to non-organic foods. If you can’t buy all organic meals then research what foods are higher in pesticides and preservatives and try to purchase those in an organic market. Other ways to save would be to check for a local farmers market or grow your own fruits and veggies. Check for sales in your local organic market so you can benefit from the savings. 🙂 I personally plan a biweekly menu using foodonthetable.com. You can have your grocery list emailed to you, ready to print!

Prov 31:15 She rises also while it is still night And gives food to her household And portions to her maidens.

Fortunately for us sweet friends, we don’t have to wake up at dawn in order to START preparing meals. We have the advantage of pre made bread for instance. 🙂 She didn’t have everything pre-made…she had to make everything from scratch and allow it time to cook. That doesn’t mean we get to sleep in everyday! We still ought to wake up early to care for our family. Her husband and children have breakfast ready when they get up. She puts thought and care into the meals she plans for her family. She gets up early in order to unsure everything planned for the day is accomplished. Her household is above her own comfort, above her own rest.

Prov 31:16 She considers a field and buys it; From her earnings she plants a vineyard.

She is an entrepanuer! She assesses the price, the value of the purchase (the field) & the benefit it could bring to her family. She decided it’s an appropriate thing to do so she purchases it. She bought this with her own earning as verse 24 states (She makes linen garments and sells them, And supplies belts to the tradesmen.). She is an entrepenuer right from her home where God put her. 🙂 It’s wonderful when a woman is entreprising if she has the time, the inclination & the talents to do things in her home that can benefit the family…that is a glorious thing!  Modern day application: What talents and abilities do you have that will generate an extra income for your family? Maybe you can knit? Knit some headbands…carfs to sell? If you are a good organizer maybe you can help others put an organizational plan together? There are just some ideas…not a requirement for a proverbs 31 woman. Some of us may have the time, others simply don’t. And that’s OK!

Prov 31:17 She girds herself with strength And makes her arms strong.

She has become strong as a result of her effort, as a result of the strength exerted in the daily routine of the home. She doesn’t call in sick or is out of commission because of a headache. Her dedication is carrying out the daily tasks with excellence has given her both strength and confidence. To be quite frank we are a generation of weak women. We don’t do 5% of what women used to do in biblical times (don’t even go so far back, 100 years ago) and we are the weakest. The simplest tasks are tiring, simply too hard to be woman. The less you do the less you want to do…THAT is the modern woman. WE need to change this ladies. If we are going to impact the next generation for the Lord we need to recapture what biblical womanhood and strength IS…recapture it and LIVE IT OUT! OR our daughters will go around wanting to have a robot server because it’s too much work to go to the fridge! 🙂

Prov 31:18 She senses that her gain is good; Her lamp does not go out at night.

She does what is beneficial to everyone in her family. Her motivation and what she lives for is to be a blessing to them. Her motivation is not self-fulfillment, not self indulgence, but the inherent goodness in what she is doing in the lives of those she deems precious. The family is not organized in a way that everyone has to attend to her, but rather in that she is committed to give herself away for the goodness of everyone else.

Prov31:20 She extends her hand to the poor, And she stretches out her hands to the needy.

She demonstrate not only special devotion to her family but to those not unfortunate enough to be in her home. Modern day application: See my article on the right “Homeless but Evangelized” for some ideas of what you can do for your local homeless friends.

Prov 31:22 She makes coverings for herself; Her clothing is fine linen and purple.

She appreciates her beauty. You may be thinking…WHAT time does this lady have to take care of herself? My goodness!!! 🙂 The answer: she finds it! She doesn’t dress in pj’s all day…and doesn’t have crazy hair when her husband comes home everyday. She loves looking beautiful for her husband. She knows how to take care of herself in order to express her beauty & loveliness to her husband.

Prov 31:25 Strength and dignity are her clothing, And she smiles at the future.

She is clothed with spiritual character. She has dignity. She is above common and trivial things. She has true class, true virtue. She has godly character. The proverbs 31 woman is concerned about noble issues. The power of true character can be seen in the fact that she smiles at the future. Her life is right with God and THAT secures her blessings!

Prov 31:26 She opens her mouth in wisdom, And the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.

She is the epitome of wisdom and kindness. She guides her family daily, including her husband, with words of wisdom (the Word). Her home is a classroom all day long as she imparts the love of God and His law to her children.

Prov 31:27 She looks well to the ways of her household, And does not eat the bread of idleness.

She manages the children & home. She is not eating the bread of idleness but the bread of loving hard work. She doesn’t lounge around because she doesn’t “feel” like doing anything.

Prov 31:28 Her children rise up and bless her; Her husband also, and he praises her, saying: 29 Many daughters have done nobly, But you excel them all.”

She poured out her life, her everything into her family (her heart attitude). What does she get in return? True sanctification.

Prov 31:30 & 31 Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain, But a woman who fears the LORD, she shall be praised. Give her the product of her hands, And let her works praise her in the gates.

What is the product of her hands? All the good she has done to others, comes back to her. All the sacrifice, everything she did in private will come back in public as they praise her at the gates. Her husband raves about her. He is knows as the husband of ________ so and so. 🙂 She will be famous for her godly womanhood, thats her earthly reward. Her heavenly reward is “well done my good and faithful servant. Enter to the joy of your Master!”

Praise God for His grace and mercy. We can do this!!!! He wouldn’t have said we can if He didn’t plan to equipp us. God doesn’t call the equipped, He equips the called. If you have a husband and even have been blessed with children then God HAS equipped you to do the job He has called you to do. 🙂 We will NEVER get all this perfect, we weren’t made to. If we would then we wouldn’t need neither Jesus  or Grace. We need both because we will never be perfect until’ we see Him. Take courage sweet friends…we are all in this together! As sisters who share a marvelous journey into becoming godly woman of character, virtue and FAITH. Perfection doesn’t exist what does exist is sanctification and God promised that he would continue to work in us until’ the return of Christ. Hallelujah! 🙂