Perspective…we all need it desperately.

I adore my kids.  There’s nothing that brings more joy to me than seeing these little ones grow up both in wisdom and stature. Seeing them be born and go from crawling to walking from cooing to praying…singing bible songs, wanting to read bible stories. I love seeing God work in their lives from such a young age. If you are one of my regular readers then you know by now that I want nothing more than to live New Testament Christianity. I want to go back to living by the  principles outlined in the Bible…the way I parent my precious blessings is a priority for me. I am committed to schooling (training up) my children to fear and love the Lord all the way through high school. So this post is about our role as a mother…it is a change of perspective I believe we need. Our culture perceives children as another thing on our check list…a “problem”. Ever heard the saying one child one problem, two children 2 problems, no children no problems?! Well I have and that is the way I was raised believe it or not. I wanted 2. No more than two. I can handle two problems, I thought. LOL. Little did I know God was going to waltz into my life and undo me. I am glad he did.It would have been a train wreck! I would have been self centered…I would have never taught my children the Word, Integrity or values. Why? Not because I didn’t want to but because I can’t impart what I don’t possess. My perspective on children has dramatically changed in the past 8 years I have been walking with Jesus. I see my children as Christ sees them. Blessings!

There are days in which I would be lying if I said I didn’t lose perspective on what’s important in my life. As a perfectionist I cringe at the thought of a messy home or dishes piled. God showed me today how much my perspective needs a tune up now and then….

It’s been a while since I’ve worn Kenny.  I used to do it when he was a tiny baby at 5.10 lbs. I loved it. I decided to take him in my sling to the park. The moment was surreal. He snuggled up and enjoyed just being with mommy. I realized how much I missed holding him so close for more than 10 mins at a time. I realized how blessed I am to be his mommy. How merciful God is in allowing me to raise these little ones. He trusted me to mold them and shape them into the men/women they will become one day. How amazing and terrifying at the same time. Me? I have to teach them everything they know? Ohh goodness. I can do nothing more than fall on my knees at the thought of being accountable for 4 little lives (4 so far, we pray God will bless us with more). I think sometimes (more than we wish to admit) we focus on the temporal instead of the eternal. Especially if you have multiple children in the home…it can be described as serene chaos. It is much easier for a mom of 3-4 to focus on the temporal than it is to step back and look at the big picture. I mean after all how can we? Our heads are so buried in the NOW, how do I get through today to worry about the big picture. When we do step back and see the big picture, only regret and guilt set in, so we just stop revising our parenting all together. We decide we are going to get through today and that’s all we can do. At some point we lowered our expectations, and kissed good-bye all the plans we had for training our little ones when they were born and settled for “getting through.”  We set sail through life on our boats (as damaged as it may be) because we don’t see any other way of doing it. Despair and depression set in and now we are far from land…with no map, our boat taking in water…knwoing we need help we cry out to God but the task (changing us, the way we do things) is so gigantic we crawl back on our boat of mediocrity because that’s what we know to do. God is trying to give us His perspective, He is trying to teach us a better way to be a mother. To be the kind of mom who happens to LIVE instead of the one who let’s life happen to her. We (I included) have been caught in the crashing waves of life. Dishes, laundry, cleaning, meals…etc. We end up not living a beautiful, full and glorious life God intended us to live but something we settled for. If that is you beloved, I have news for you…you don’t need to settle for anything LESS than what God said you can be. Changing our perspective is step one in changing the course of our journey. One step at a time. We need to have perspective when we parent…or we will just be parents who react instead of parents who act. Let me explain…if you are waiting around for your children to do something and then react to it that is allowing your child to be in control of what happens. If we are actively parenting (by a daily schedule) then we are in control and we wont be parents who react but who are actively leading their children in this journey called LIFE. I am very guilty of being at times a reactive parent rather than an active one, but God uses those times in my life to show me His way of parenting is a much better way. We need to have perspective as women as well. We are beautiful, every single one of us. Fearfully and wonderfully made. Captivating and adventurous…don’t settle for the lies you have been told on who you are. Let nothing you have done define you. Let who Christ says you ARE permiate your being until’ it reached your very core. THEN, and only then can you find fullness of life. Our identity as women and moms isn’t what we do or what we think we aren’t (beautiful enough, thin enough…rich enough) but who we are in Christ. You are a princess, captivating, beautiful, adventurous…fierce in nature. Dwell on that for a while my sweet friend…

Here’s some perspective…in the midst of the daily grind we can be so overwhelmed we don’t see our little ones as the blessings they truly are. Sometimes it takes something tragic to makes us realize how much we need to cherish each moment with them. What if your child got cancer? Would you change the way you interact with them on a daily basis? Would you do anything different? What if you know he/she only had months to live? Would you say you are parenting with your heart and soul? So many times we take for granted our little ones, we see all the work that they require and fail to see what blessings they truly are.

Bringing joy and beauty to our years. Children are the crown of a godly woman. They rise up and call her blessed as Prov 31 states. But in order for that to happen we must life a life that actively seeks to lead them to God and fully live all the adventures God has for us as a family together. Yes it is work, Yes it is tiring and YES it is even more rewarding. I encourage you to pray the Lord restores to you the Joy of being blessed with little ones if you are just tired and worn out…run to Him who gives rest to the weary. In order to change the next generation we must begin with changing ourselves and that includes our perspective. The way we see things will determine the way we live life. You have the most important job in the world mama. You get to raise the next generation of New Testament Christians. True followers of God, true worshippers right in your very home. God did not entrust those little ones to anyone else. He entrusted them to us and we simply can;t shirk that responsibility to someone else. We ARE accountable for the way we parent. We are accountable for what we inject in them. We are accountable for our attitude toward them.

 

I say, let’s look around and count our blessings…women and children are dying on the other side of the world due to starvation and abuse. How hard do we really have it? Perspective. Thousands of little girls are sold each year as a sex slave. How hard do you have it? Perspective.  Have you gained perspective yet? However much or little we have, we are blessed. We are blessed to be children of God and to be right where we are at.

As mothers, our home is our mission field and our children are the harvest. We need to gain perspective, jump out of the boat and start living the life God intended you to live. A beautiful life of hope, full of adventures and overflowing with love. Our children are such miracles. Our task so important…the way they are raised will determine who they become. You have an opportunity to impact the next generation and it starts with US. We MUST change ourselves in order to be effective parents to our children. As role models of God’s mercy, grace and love always imparting Truth and showing them how to live a life of integrity, honor and excellence.

Life is but a breath…are you breathing well? Are your breaths short and fast or are they long and slow…are you just getting through or are you enjoying the journey. We all get there…the difference is in the HOW…the journey itself. 🙂

Our family motto: “Service before self and excellence in all we do.”

Family scripture: ” As for me and my house, we will serve the LORD.” Joshua 24:15

About Disciple of Christ, Wife, Mommy of 5 blessings & NM Top Earner.

As a wife, homeschooling stay at home mom of 5 beautiful blessings, taxi, chef, doctor, philosopher etc, my life is full of adventures everyday. Most of the adventures lead me to find another lost piece of my identity concealed deep within my heart. I have always felt that there was more to life than just “making it through”. After 5 little ones (4 under 4 & in diapers), I lost all the pieces I had found along the way. I was left with thinking my identity was being a wife and mom. “This can’t be all there is to me!”, I reasoned. Who am I? What’s in my heart? Why do I thrive around beauty and my heart leaps for joy when experiencing something as simple as a sunset. A feeling like I am free, inside. My heart can breathe again as if it had been holding its oxygen all along. Did God make me like this, I wondered? I felt guilty for longing to let my heart be free once again. After all the picture we have of a “perfect” woman is one that is ALWAYS busy! Always volunteering, always giving of herself with never once a thought of the state of her inner being. That is why we lose our hearts. Vulnerability is not welcomed anywhere. Femininity in its purest form is frowned upon. Why? Because women are supposed to be tough! The kind of tough that is just wrong. We are trained to hide our vulnerability, along with our femininity, very early in life. The wounds we have received as little girls leave us reacting as women like that wounded little girl would: we retreat, we regress. The message we received? You can’t trust anyone! Your femininity and vulnerability is a weakness. Most of us walk through life “playing” or pretending to be someone we’re truly not. As adults, we make choices based on how we were programmed when we were young. The real us hides somewhere inside, waiting to be rescued. Like a wounded animal hiding from its master, wanting to trust and soar again, but so afraid of the uncertainty that awaits. The risk is not worth it, we think to ourselves. To be quite honest most of you have not found a safe place to be yourselves. Embarking on a quest to find the real you takes courage. God created you in His image. Adam bears the image of a warrior God. A man is supposed to tell the world, on God’s behalf, He will come through for you. Eve bears the image of a captivating God and her heart is made to show His beauty. A woman is supposed to tell the world, everything is ok. She is that calm & quiet spirit. Safety; a place of refuge and healing beauty. This is what our hearts long for; Eden. The place for which we were created. The place in our hearts we know we belong. I am just a simple girl on a quest to finding my heart. Not the way I was “shaped” by the world but the way God created me. I pray that this journey will be encouraging and uplifting to others. I am going on an adventure and invite you to come with me! I am very transparent because that is what this world needs! With all my love, Laire

Posted on January 19, 2012, in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink. 7 Comments.

  1. Thank you so much Kirsty for your prayers as well dear saint! You both are just a breath of fresh air! Love and prayers ❤ 😀

  2. Eric and I are trying and praying that the Lord would bless us with children. We are learning truly what it means to “wait upon the Lord” 😀 Until then, I am soaking up so much knowledge from you, Kirsty, as well as other godly saints. Question: Can I come live at your house? Kidding. HAHAHA! Sounds like so much fun there. 🙂 Those children are certainly blessed, the Lord is so good.

  3. I am SO encouraged by reading this post! Even cried a little. :*) Thank you sister. God bless your labors.

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